When do worries become cause for concern?
I receive a lot of messages from parents regarding their concern over the care their child is receiving. Sometimes these concerns require immediate intervention such as cases of abuse and neglect. Other times parents are looking for guidance on whether or not their concerns are founded. Parents are certainly not alone in their worries. Most have feelings of guilt and concern when they have to leave their child. But when do these worries become cause for concern?
My child is sick all the time.
Generally, children in child care do suffer from more colds and illnesses than those who stay at home. This is due to the close proximity of play and the fact that the children come from different households bringing in any number of viruses on a daily basis. Children mouth toys and items all the time making the spread of any virus almost a given. Parents should talk with their child care provider on how often she cleans the toys and equipment and how she does this. A part water, part bleach solution is all that is necessary to kill germs on toys, play surfaces, equipment, door handles, etc. It's the regularity of cleaning that makes the difference.
Hand washing proceedures are also important. Ask about this policy as well. Watch how often the children wash their hands. Do they do so before meals, after using the toilet, etc.? Are they taught how to properly wash their hands? Are there posters in the bathrooms showing the children how to rinse the germs down the drain? How about the staff? Are they practicing good hand washing techniques?
My child is clingy and cries when I drop him/her off.
Children adjust to care at different rates. Where one child who is outgoing and curious will thrive right away, another who may not be accustomed to being around other children on a daily basis and for hours on end may find the whole thing very stressful. Talk to your provider about how your child is adjusting and if there are any concerns about her getting along with the other kids. Is she joining in with the group activities or does she tend to sit out or play quietly on her own? If so, have there been any improvements over the time she's been in care? What does the provider recommend to help her adjust? If she is clearly not happy, a smaller group setting such as a family home-care environment may be better for her.
Log your concerns.
Keep a log of your concerns, including date, time, staff involved, and details of the incident itself. This will enable you to spot potential patterns of problems with your child's care and give you an opportunity to address these issues with the teacher or director. It will also provide a comprehensive list to state licensing or the police if the concerns are serious enough to warrant intervention.
Talk with your child.
Ask your child, every day, to tell you one thing she enjoyed at the daycare. Even a young children can answer this basic question. She may actually be having more fun than you realize. Ask her to tell you one bad thing. Again, if there is a consistency in her complaints, you need to speak to your child's teacher and/or the director.
Talk with your provider.
Finally, you should always address your concerns as they arise. Don't wait until you are at your witt's end. Doing so helps you to assess the situation before it festers with you and clouds your judgement. Plus it lets the provider know you care about what happens at the facility. Keep a positive, rather than accusatory tone when you do address concerns. Tell the teacher/director what you like about the care being provided, then mention your concerns. You'll generally find the caregiver more receptive and less defensive about what you have to say, alloing for a more productive discussion.
Contact your state licensing office or the police.
If things don't improve, contact your state/provincial licensing board. (http://www.childcare.net/licensing.shtml). Ask about the facility's record, any complaints lodged against them, any licensing infractions, etc. Inform them of your concerns and ask for their advice. They are the ones, short of the police for incidents of abuse and neglect, etc., who can assist you (have documented proof re: your log as mentioned above). Do what you have to do protect your child. If you are uneasy about your child's care or uncomfortable with the teacher's/director's response to your concerns, find other arrangements. I know it is not always easy especially for parents who require assistance or who are just barely getting by. But your child depends on you for her safety and well-being.
You might also find this article informative: http://www.childcare.net/library/howsafe.shtml .
Committed to your success in child care,
Catherine Pruissen
CEO/Founder
http://childcare.net
